Will we survive Triumph the Insult Dog?

Well, Canada we'll be having another Royal Commission in no time. All those nasty things we may have said about President Bush over the years, that comment by Chretien's press secretary about him being a moron, the suggestions that he might not be the smartest dude in the world. Well, it all came back to kick us last night. Triumph the Insult Dog went to Quebec City, and folks if people think that Don Cherry was over the top, don't let them anywhere near a tape of Triumph's visit. It's a good thing there's a language gap, because Triumph would have sent a CBC tape delay guardian into rehab, such was the nature of his vitriol. Last nights performance will be the topic of almost all conversations for the rest of today and beyond.

Triumph the insult dog, for those not in the know, is a recurring character on the Conan O'Brien show. He makes Muchmusic's Ed the Sock, look like Casey or Finnegan from the old Mr. Dressup show. Conan's had a pretty successful run in Toronto this week, but one suspects he won't be asked to do a show in Quebec anytime soon. Hell, there may be calls for Conan to be deported this morning. Triumph lived up to his obnoxious self, savaging everything Quebecois, the food, the language, the bodily odours, Triumph showed no mercy. And the crowd ate it up, Ontario/Quebec relations may never be the same.

Dyane Adam, the Language Commissioner who found Mr. Cherry's comments of interest, is going to be positively beside herself this morning. It'll be all hands on deck at the investigative branch at the Official Languages bunker, if they needed two bureaucrats to examine Cherry's comments, the entire department should be on overtime for a year. In a country steeped in Political correctness, this is going to be a wild ride.

It may even take the heat off of Paul Martin for a few minutes, but not many. Expect the Bloc Quebecois to rail against this canine of culutural assasination. Triumph found the submerged anxieties of Quebec and the rest of Canada, ripped them open and then trotted off. No doubt lifting his leg all the way.

Imagine how the promoters in the Federal cabinet and the Province of Ontario, are going to explain away the million dollars spent to bring the show to Toronto. For the Quebec media and the politicians there, it's like a gift from heaven. They won't care that Triumph routinely savages all things American, he will have hit a nerve. If Jack Layton was so terribly disappointed with Don Cherry's little visor commentary, Lord knows what he's going to do with what was about a seven minute travelogue of bad behaviour. Early commentary from Quebec is showing a shocked reacton to the skit, one communications specialist said that it wasn't going to be well received when Quebec awakens.

Canadian satirists can only dream of the chance to do that kind of material. Had Air Farce, 22 minutes or Mercer tried the same kind of comedy, their funding would have dried up in mere seconds. Had the CBC aired the Conan show, heads would be rolling out the Barbara Frum atrium, all the way down to Lake Ontario. Last nights show may be like that wild party you once attended, overindulging in everything only to wake up the next morning and wonder what the hell happened. Eventually, you suffer a bit of that guilty unease about what took place, and how you reacted. Such will be the shock value of Triumph.

Don Cherry actually put the segment into perspective, said Cherry: "It's easy for Conan, he can leave the city after Friday" Interestingly enough, Cherry turned down an invitation to appear on the O'Brien show earlier this week, as he didn't like the way Torontonians were reacting to the whole visit. Talk about a brilliant stroke of luck, after Triumph's appearance, Cherry could very well qualify for an Order of Quebec citation for cultural awareness.