Bring It on Denmark!

Are we on the cusp of hostilities with the Danes; is there oil under that thar pile of rocks? Do they need space for a penal colony? Have they become the latest belligerent nation to flex its muscles in uncertain times? Could it be our posting of Alfonso Gagliano as ambassador was the last straw for them? Hey come on Danes, we brought him back, we’re sorry!

Whatever the reason, the Danes have their eyes on some uncharted spit of rock off of Greenland, called Hans Island. And they’re ready to rumble! Denmark has apparently already sent warships in the past to lay claim to the island, located in the strait between Canada and Greenland, landing soldiers to plant the Danish flag upon those isolated barrens.

In response to the latter day invasion of the Vikings, Canada has filed a complaint! Now that should send them packing! And if our strong diplomatic verbiage is not enough, we’re flexing our muscles as well. This summer (because apparently we have no ships that can operate in an Arctic winter) we will send a destroyer HMCS Montreal, a squadron of Griffin helicopters and 200 troops of the Royal Canadian Regiment into the high artic to show the flag and remind the Danes and anyone else that the North is ours, when we can get it to it!

The operation code named Narwhal apparently has nothing to do with the Danish dispute (nudge, nudge, wink, wink) but is purely the continuation of Canadian sovereignty patrols over those hard to reach places. The Defense Department also has plans to send the Canadian Rangers, off to the area to train and declare our intent to protect the homeland. The Rangers made up of mostly aboriginal and Inuit members on snowmobile and ATV’s, will be using antique rifles, as they apparently work best in the cold weather!

The situation had the National Post so excited over the last week that they ran a comparison of the troop strengths between the two nations, and well we came up a little short. It would seem the Danish Navy has a fleet which has ice strengthened hulls, for navigation in the North; ours apparently don’t have the necessary thickness to do much work in an ice pack environment.

Despite the goofy mouse that roared nature of all of this (it’s debatable which country is the mouse though), there is a serious side to protecting our claim to the North. With the icecap melting as it is, many experts predict that we are only about ten years away, from the North West Passage becoming a major transit way from Europe to Asia, something Canada would want to have a handle on. Losing claim to even an insignificant island such as Hans, would set a precedent for other larger, more militarily capable countries to do as they wish in the North without fear of world opinion. So while the Kingdom of Denmark fires up the warships and trains the troops. We’ll be busy getting the lawyers all in sync. It is the Canadian way after all!

For now though it’s STOP THE VIKING HORDES WHILE WE CAN, today it’s Hans Island, tomorrow they’ll be marching down Duckworth Street in St. John’s. In our hour of need, as we stand alone against the Danish horde, we should look to Winston Churchill for inspiration.

"Some chicken! Some neck!"

"When I warned them that Britain would fight on alone, whatever they did, their Generals told their Prime Minister and his divided cabinet that in three weeks, England would have her neck wrung like a chicken - Some chicken! Some neck!" -- Speech made to the Canadian Parliament on December 30, 1941. Following this speech the famous Karsh photograph was taken.

It is with that spirit that these Danish dreams, of recapturing the Glory Days of the Viking era must be stopped! We must draw our line in the Ice!