Those Dysfunctional Windsors!

Now it is highly unlikely that his Royal Highness Prince Charles, he of the House of Windsor, is a country music fan but should he find comfort in the hurtin and the cheatin genre, he would certainly relate to Toby Keith's "I wanna talk about Me".

Cause Me, Me, Me, Me, Me is what it all seems to be about at the moment. With his long desired plans to marry Camilla Parker-Bowles (soon to be Windsor) falling apart by the hour, His Highness as proclaimed his exasperation with his Royal subjects (and maybe Mama too).

Charles is an unhappy man, claiming that the people of England aren't showing him much compassion in his bid to wed the woman he loves.

The upcoming union is descending into farce and that's a bad sign for the Monarchy if ever there was one. The original plan to hold the nuptials at Windsor castle got sidelined when it was discovered that by doing that every Tom, Dick and Betty would be able to book the Dining room for a reception of their own.

So Plan "B" was put in place, a nice little ceremony at the local town hall would be fine, except Mama wouldn't be attending, not wanting to make a circus out of the special moment (as if things couldn't get anymore Barnum and Baileyish here).

Then there was the little problem revolving around the actual exchange of vows, quite a few constitutional observers and newspaper editorialists alike have all suggested that regardless of the Prince's plans any union in England proper would be pointless, as the marriage would never be considered legitimate, a situation that now finds itself heading for court of all places. Others say that a civil union is just fine, get on with the ceremonies. With these mixed messages comes the idea of a possible evacuation to Scotland (just like sister Anne did a number of years ago) was discussed as possibly Plan "C".

Now the Arch Bishop of Canterbury is urging the Prince to not allow television coverage of the almost "blessed" event, seems the Religious leaders are feeling a bit of heat over their plan to contribute an official okey dokey to the whole thing. Hence the idea of leaving the cameras on the outside, perhaps that is from the book of out of sight out of mind! We'll just have to wait for those Windsor family home movies to be made public.

Perhaps the BBC could get ahead of the curve on this and make plans for a weekly reality show called "The Windsors", much like the Apprentice, Growing up Gotti and such, we can sit in as Charles battles it out with Mom and Dad over the marriage and the inheritance of the throne. Not to mention all the other lovely feuds that pop up among the inhabitants of the House of Windsor. All of which should be leaving Camilla to sit in an easy chair, pondering exactly why it is she wishes to join this rather dysfunctional group of Royals.

Then again perhaps it should be comedy, the Windsors are making the Simpsons look positively family oriented by comparison. I don't know about you, but I'd take Marge, Homer, Bart, Lisa and Maggie over Liz, Phil, Charles, Andy, Annie and Eddie boy any day of the week!

Perhaps Charles and Camilla could do all concerned a favour and just elope! One thing is certain, Republicans in the UK must be in giddy glee, the Monarchy as an institution is taking it's hits, resembling of more a farce than a force these days.